Lived Experience Forum

[Bow]

Not really @BPDSurvivor can’t answer those questions 

[WIP]

Thank you @BPDSurvivor  for taking the time to so thoughtfully reply to me.

I am looking forward to participating in some therapy that could actually work and help me.  I know I'll be given the tools of DBT by the therapist, but it's up to me to do the practice of implementing these tools into life.

When she mentioned 'emotional dysregulation', she was spot on! I've cried nearly every day for the past 18+ plus and can't control it. I have become quite angry/frustrated by the psychiatrist I have been seeing for the past 18 months - under his care, my MH has gotten worse.

I've developed a habit of having a very negative mindset - the 'captain criticism' self talk that goes on in my mind is constant.  As you said The voice of depression is very different to the voice of hope. 
I openly admit that currently I no longer have any hope and do have the belief that I will not get better.  This mindset needs to shift!! I can't go on living like this - well, I just exist really. I don't have any quality of life atm.

I will embrace seeing this DBT therapist, and attend weekly sessions as long as I can afford to. 

I used to be a very strong person, I hope to find that strength again.

Hugs,

WIP

[BPDSurvivor]

Hey @Bow ,

That's perfectly okay. You don't have to answer the questions. It's just something to consider.

I give you immense credit for reaching out. There is a flame of desire underneath all the hopelessness. 

Im here with you. You are not alone. I urge you to continue reaching out.

Hugs,

BPDSurvivor

[BPDSurvivor]

@Shaz51 @BlueBay @Aniela @Nells @JJ4 @vashi @BPDrose @Luca33 @Sarah_850 @Olliesmum @asdfge @SunflowerMe @magical_journey @Tbo @sarvan @Snoopy56 @sanity41 @Ellan @Laylah @Flossy92 @Bow @BPDSurvivor @Jacaranda84@WIP 

[BPDSurvivor]

@Shaz51 @BlueBay @Aniela @Nells @JJ4 @vashi @BPDrose @Luca33 @Sarah_850 @Olliesmum @asdfge @SunflowerMe @magical_journey @Tbo @sarvan @Snoopy56 @sanity41 @Ellan @Laylah @Flossy92 @Bow @BPDSurvivor @Jacaranda84@WIP 

[Bow]

Cheers @BPDSurvivor hope it was ok to tag ya in something. Thought from a BPD...

[BPDSurvivor]

Of course it's okay.

Thanks @Bow 

[Judi9877]

Hi @BPDSurvivor and everyone here. I'm just popping in to let you know @BPDSurvivor that I remember one of my old support workers bringing my attention to the '3 minds' that you posted about earlier here. Believe me when I say the past week or so, I can reflect that I've been dealing a lot in the Emotional mind phase with me letting my emotions rule and becoming very stressed out by anything that even slightly goes wrong. That has included my car, Uni stress, housing issues, the rules here in Melbourne about covid, my friends and family, etc and it's led me to say some things in anger that probably shouldn't have been said. I've even mentioned SH but I haven't resorted to that luckily. Things have just been tough for me and my MH has suffered, especially the BPD side of things. Things are better but I'm so glad you brought up the minds thing again as I really needed to be reminded of it so a huge thank you😊💐!

Thanks for reading this! Stay safe and take care like I'm planning to do by looking after myself.

Judi9877🌻

[BlueBay]

I hate art @BPDSurvivor 

I remember once while an inpatient I did art. I struggled so much with drawing thst I sat there and sobbed. I wanted to hide away. I ended up leaving the group. The psychologist followed me out but couldn't encourage me to try again. 
I do enjoy colouring in though!! 

[BPDSurvivor]

Hey @BlueBay ,

Dont stress. I hate art too. I don't like colouring either - not because I don't enjoy the process... I just don't know what to do with the product so I think it's a waste of time. 

Im mainly going to the DBT art groups for connection, not for art. 

Have a good day!

BPDSurvivor